4.25.2012

Expectations...

We all have them.

Expectations.

Sometimes they are met. Sometimes they are not. And sometimes, when all the stars aline in the sky, they are EXCEEDED.

I think about all the expectations I set for people, myself included, and then think about how often they are actually met, much less exceeded. I can admit that I always  frequently often may sometimes set ridiculously high moderate challenging expectations, but I also believe that people (myself included) rise to the occasion. However (and that is a big however).... WHY do I need to put that much pressure on anyone?

For example:
1. I expect the golden rule. I expect people to be kind, generous, thoughtful and giving. I expect people to go out of their way for others.
2. I expect my students to do things for themselves. (luckily, they pretty much exceed my expectations on a regular basis).
3. I expect my children to behave. (HA!)
4. I expect my waistline to shrink on its own because I'm nursing. (Double HA!)
5. I expect myself to plan fabulous parties, keep up with 3 kids, a full-time job, a husband, a blog, friends, family, church, oh...and myself. (Triple HA!)
6. I expect Ryan to know my every thought and be able to react before I tell him something.

And before you start rolling your eyes and call me every name in the book, think about what YOU expect out of others and yourself.

Then pause.

Then breathe.

Then, ask yourself, "Why?"

Why do we expect so much from others? From ourselves? I defend the thought that people rise to the occasion, but if it's going to always drive you crazy when they don't... then is it okay to let up? Is it okay to lower expectations just to keep yourself from going crazy? Part of me says "yes - it is ok" but a bigger part of me screams, "NO!!"

I think where I struggle the most, is when to choose door A and door B. I am in the middle of planning Emersyn's 2nd birthday party. It is going to be "tutu" adorable and fun. I have big plans...BIG plans. I already have it laid out in my head. Adorable decorations, yummy cake, fun games, creative invitations, etc. My best friend/arch nemesis Pinterest with the added bonus of crafty blogs of SAHMs/She-ras are sure to aid in my insanity preparation, right?

I mean, if Martha Stewart can make invitations out of leaves, twigs, cinnamon sticks, homemade ink and hot glue, then why can't I?

Expectations.

I seriously almost drove myself crazy yesterday thinking of her invitations. Door A. They were going to be handmade, one-of-a-kind, miniature tutus that each guest would swoon over for days on end throw in the trash after marking the party date down in their calendars.

Then. The HMMomma gave me some tough love. Door B. It's an invitation. For a two year old. 15 people are invited. Send an email. :)

But I couldn't let up. As soon as the kiddos were in bed I went back to the dining room table/craft area and forced my vision to work. I could buy bigger envelopes. I could hot glue lace to elastic. I could...

I could just stop.

And breathe.

And recognize that my expectations for myself may need to lighten up.

So. I did what any wanna-be-craft-genius does and went straight to Etsy. Found a perfectly adorable invitation template for $15 and bought it. (I did second guess the decision, but Ryan assured me it was ok). I even went so far as to make Cindy send me the following text:

Katy.
You love your kids.
Take a break.
Pay $15 for cute invites that people are going to throw away.
Spend the time you save playing with your kids.

And so I did.

And while, I have no idea where this post is going or what it was really supposed to accomplish. I hope that it motivates you to keep your expectations high, such as...

1. Expect yourself to love your God.
2. Expect yourself to give everything to your husband and kids.
3. Expect yourself to give yourself a break.
4. Expect yourself to breathe. To do nothing for 15 whole minutes.
5. Expect yourself to be kind to others. (That golden rule really is important...and, well, HMMomma and I kinda live by the motto "INTH" (it's not that hard). It's NOT that hard to be nice. It's NOT that hard to be thoughtful. It's NOT that hard to apologize. It's NOT that hard to say thank you. It's NOT that hard to... but that's a different blog post)
6. Expect someone to someday exceed any expectation you could ever set.
7. And expect Door B to be just as amazing as anything behind Door A ever could be.



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